Does It Offend You, Yeah?

I've made up my mind. If any of my friends can suggest something to do, I'll do it with them. From today going forward, I will always say yes*. Reason being: you can never tell what kind of adventures you'll end up in. I'd like to take credit for this particular occasion, but in all fairness, I can't. I called up some friends (let's call them Bear and Monk), I haven't seen in a while, and told them they had to meet me for drinks, or else. It took some persuasion, but they both conceded and Monk picked a place called Maxwells in Hoboken, NJ.

I was having a rough day at work. Just about everything that could go wrong, went wrong. I was getting so frustrated, I decided to kick out early. Just as I'm leaving, my client decides to swagger over with a laundry list of complaints. He chewed my ear out for a good 45 minutes. All the while, I'm thinking... fucking choke on a pretzel already.

I finally landed myself on the Path Train towards Hoboken. And here's where things get interesting. So the Path was crowded and humid, really no surprise. It had a faint smell of musty old leather. Getting on the train, of course, is like a human version of Tetris - you have to maneuver, rotate, and fold yourself in just the right way. I noticed this elderly woman (a cougar if you will?) in a light blue floral print dress with red rimmed glasses. She was standing nearly two feet away. I flashed her a smile as I was silently laughing at her. She was clutching onto a railing for dear life. She smiled back as the train swayed and swooshed and gathered up speed. I was in a solid state. My smile was beaming brighter and brighter as I noticed her sneaking glances my way. Before you ask, dear reader, I should tell you, she had on her hand a brightly polished wedding band. I didn't even make an attempt (although, in hindsight, I should have talked her up a bit, if for no other reason than to practice). But having someone check you out adds a certain bounce to your step.

So we got to Maxwells, and I ordered some grub, and a few drinks. I hadn't seen these boys in a while, so we were just catching up. Monk suggested we buy tickets to the show for that night. I was leaning towards going home early. It was my turn to do morning support at work, which meant waking up at the ass crack of dawn and making sure nothing breaks. Bear decided to head out early for similar reasons. I decided to go with my gut on this one and said fuck it... I'll go.

Right off the bat, I realized I made the right choice. This place was a hipster haven. Ok, I had a few drinks, and was ranting and raving about my previous bizarre weekends. So I didn't even notice when the first band (sorry, forgot their name) came onto the stage. All of a sudden, I couldn't hear myself talk. I look around, and there were tons of young'ens around us dancing to these two chics screaming on stage. I saw this cute little asian girl with a short white top, bleached blonde bangs, and a red skirt over black tights.

"Great band, or greatest band ever?" I asked her over my shoulder. She had this stumped look on her face, and I was instantly losing focus. I think I have A.D.D. when it comes to girls. I lose interest pretty quickly unless they can keep me entertained. I'm still trying to work on that. Note: shiny accessories are a plus.

"Um, greatest band ever?" She managed to squeak out.

I went on a rant about how my friend and I are in a band and we're looking for a drummer (we only just thought about making a band that night... probably won't go anywhere). When we find one we like, we'll be playing bars all over New York. I told her that if she played her cards right, I'll let her be our roadie. She's laughed a little. She laughed at a couple of other jokes too, but it wasn't going anywhere. I ended up ditching her to meet some old friends from high school, who unbeknownst to me, just so happen to work at the bar.

I'm about to bail, but was caught off guard by the second band to play (they're British): Does it Offend You, Yeah? This band pretty much rocks. They had the crowd jumping and dancing within seconds, which is perfect for me because I like to shake my ass on the dance floor: got some looks, but no takers from this crowd.

I think one thing that hurt me was that the venue was just too loud. I found myself yelling a lot, but it wasn't going too far. This kind of sucks because there's plenty of variety: a veritable buffet of indie rock hipsters. Secondly, I didn't build any physical connection with the Asian chic. It was like I was stuck in "open" mode the whole time.

Live and learn I guess,

-=HeLO =-